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A Realization... Time to get going...

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Raven Wolf

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I watched a DVD of the movie "Seabiscut" tonight....

Words cannot express what learning things I never knew about one of the greatest racehorses who ever lived and his jocky did to me.

This horse was manipulated by his first owner and forced to be a looser, because they did not like his attitude, and wanted to use him to teach others to win. He was held back for the first few years of his life.

His rider was a guy who'd gotten the short end of the stick his whole life, since this was during the time of the stock market crash. Also, according to the movie, he had lost the sight in one of his eyes, due to a head injury he got while boxing to try to make a little money. The two came together, battered, broken, angry....and healed each other. They begain to win.... and just before the biggest race of their career, the man was injured while on another horse. His leg was broken, and he was told he'd never ride again. The owners temp. hired another rider, just to fill in, and he won. A few races later, Seabiscut injured his leg as well. He was almost "put down" right then, but the owners wanted to give him a chance to live...even if he never raced again. After months, horse and rider healed each other, and a "lame" horse, ridden by a half-blind man with a broken (still was healing) leg, went on to win one of the biggest races in professional Thouroughbred racing.

Most of you don't know this.... but I have a "gift" with horses. When I was a teenager, I planned to try to become the first female trainer and rider in history to win the Triple Crown. Well, I may not do that.... but if a half blind man can do what he did, with a broken leg, on the back of a "lame" horse who'd been "trained to loose" all his life.............. Then what can a Half-blind woman, with a "bumb" leg, who's ALSO been "Trained to Loose" all her life do???

There's things I want to do before I die....

I want to ride a horse again, like I did when I was younger...Maybe even get back to training, the way I was teaching myself to do, all those years ago.................

I want to use my talents as an intuitive and my passion for the paranormal/metaphysical, and make a difference... working on violent crimes........... and making paranormal discoveries.

I want to enrich the world with my art.... My screenplay writing/song writing/ and my singing.

I want to blaze my way through this life, and never be unhappy, fearfull, or controlled by guilt ever again.

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